During my teacher training, I became engulfed in the infamous “yoga bubble.” What a beautiful, warm, fuzzy, sweet-smelling bubble it was! I felt happier and more sure of myself than ever before. Although I was a little sad when the intensive was over, I felt ready to re-enter the “real world” as a whirlwind of positive vibes, leaving peaceful smiles and colorful Om symbols in my wake!
Well, that didn’t happen. My “regular old life” – complete with stress and bills and busy kid schedules and toxic relationships – was still there waiting for me. I was armed with a new skill set for dealing with these things, and felt more confident when doing so. But I missed yoga school. I missed spending all day with my insightful classmates and teachers. I missed nice people who were accepting of me and cared about what I had to share. I missed having a valid reason for wearing pajama pants 24/7. I even missed drinking Yogi tea at the shala – it didn’t seem to taste nearly as good at my house!
For my SEVA project, I spent a day helping construct a geodesic hemp dome on a friend’s property. I was a little hesitant as I drove there, reverting to my pre-yoga-teacher-training, self-conscious ways: “What if I don’t know anyone else there? Will I really be of any help, or just in the way? I don’t have a clue about hemp domes!” I considered turning around and going home.
As soon as I arrived, I knew I was silly to have worried. I was greeted with big smiles and friendly waves from absolute strangers before I even got out of my car. Everyone kept thanking me for coming. This group of extremely kind women and men explained what to do each step of the way, and why we were doing it. Not only did I learn a lot, I also had a fun time packing the messy hempcrete into the walls.
On my way home, I was tired, dirty, and sweaty, but I appreciated the feeling of a hard day’s work. Most of all, though, I felt a familiar happiness. I realized what I ultimately missed about yoga teacher training was the sense of community, and I had gotten that back. I will be seeing these new friends again, as I plan on helping out some more and attending various activities at the dome when it’s complete. I will also keep attending classes led by all of the inspiring teachers at HYS, and try to hold onto the blissful feeling I get every time I’m there. I will try harder to keep in touch with my intensive classmates. And in this “real world” I will continue to put myself out there and do things that I normally wouldn’t; you never know what tribe awaits you.
-Stacey Clouser
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